A Working Position with David

A new Position with David ~

June 25th 2010


Time to get the ol' memory joggled, and rough out another bit of my "working" autobiography~

As time to deliver our first son came 'round, I was able to begin to do some on call, temp work occasionally to give my mother Marilyn, some time off in her live in Nursing/ Companion Aide position. She had been hired as the main live in nurse for our new friend David Frasier... this man, he was an exceptional person, made of things that I may never be able to call my own, he was so wonderful.

David was eight or nine when he was climbing in a mango fruit tree and fell out of it, breaking his neck and affecting his spine, causing him to become immediately paralyzed. The overdosing that was done to him by the hospital at that time, wrecked havoc on his already changed life. Besides becoming paralyzed, David slowly lost both his hearing and sight, from massive overdoses of medications. I remember codeine was a contributor, but not much more about what medications were given to cause his eventual full hearing loss and complete loss of vision. David went from a so-called "normal" childhood, to being quadriplegic, deaf and blind in a couple of years time.

His growth was stunted from it as well...his fingers and hands remained stunted and small, (were very small) his hands were about half the size of a typical hand, his full hand basically about the size of just my palm. His former nurses had done him a great disservice by allowing him to drink a lot, I guess they figured that, that was kind in his situation, but maybe they didn't think long enough about that. And whatever affected/effected David, physically and mentally, was going to physically/mentally affect those who took care of his daily needs, so letting him become ill, was not in his favor, nor anyone else's.

His other body parts, his internal organs, just had to be affected by the overdoses of meds, as well. With all that was apparent on the outside, we knew he was also different within, his body growth was also stunted, as he was very short, and his limbs were small. I believe his organs and intestines were way smaller than the norm, and that they were being overly exhausted from many years of being allowed (he needed help with everything, so he was effectively set up by the first indiscrepencies) to drink too much alcohol, despite many health issues. My mom thought this over and fairly quickly into that position of care, she began (slowly) decreasing the volume of his daily nightcap, and the amount that David was allowed to imbibe at parties, and social gatherings that he sometimes attended, and his health seemed to increase very rapidly.

His morning nurse and I became the best of friends, her name was Bellhinia, or "just Bell" for short (pronunciation is Bell-he-nee-ah), and I bonded with and will always love her. So the duties were to be there for whatever David should need or want daily and at night and in the night!

The lawsuit pursued by his parents, and their lawyer, was very successful and there was a lifetimes worth of money for David to be cared for. Which was only just beginning to get low just before my darling friend was so called "laid to rest". BUT Knowing him well, after years around him, I completely prefer to think of my pal, as... finally "dancing to his hearts content", while looking at everything in great detail, and with oohs and aah's galore... while listening to the songs of some crystalline music of the spheres, or even some grundgy rock music...in another parallel dimension in time! (Love you David!)

To care for David was to write letters to many people, read him books, set him up at his ham radio which his father had the where-with-all to teach him, at eight and onward...ham radio was Davids outlet to the world and he had a ton of very long-time friends and companions from knowing how to do that. Basically it was his computer, before computers were popular.

You made meals, or heated them up when made, you helped him in everything. You sat typing to him sometimes, just talking about life and things, on the Braille Typewriter that he placed his finger on to hear you "speak". He then spoke to you in his own voice to return dialog. He was also incredibly telepathic, that became apparent right away, and his memory was like a (computer?) notebook of dates, of every ones birthdays and of any events, or holidays to come or any special times in the past, between you as friends. i guess he had a lot of quiet time to keep it accurate.

To finish this up, use your imagination about how many things were needed to keep him well, and happy. It was a very important position, in it's way, he could not have survived without on time, full time care. My mom had a whole new room built for David while she worked for him, with a computer suited for his use and a new bathtub with jets to help with skin issues, from poor circulation....we loved the man dearly. David was more than a great friend, he became family, and I took merely care of him sometimes, not the other way around~ we became friends before I began to work for him since my mom lived in his home.

He is/was a great person who was always upbeat and positive, and when I with all my "blessings and gifts" was feeling low, he always lifted my spirit, even if it did make me feel a little selfish to be feeling low, when he was in his situation and he was SO glad to be alive. He wrote a very positive life-story once about what had happened to him and his perspective...and had it printed up for a few friends and family members. I read it once, and was so glad to have come to know him, there was not a bit of animosity about his situation, he was still, as in real life, just happy to have survived the fall. I know he is happy I am writing and remembering him today...David was an American, born in Hawaii of Scottish ancestry.

I believe that David had a sort of special connection to my son Hanale, when he arrived, since I had allowed my mom to be my doula, (she delivered babies too) she had become interested in doing that when we visited The Farm (Intentional Community, in TN) and she helped me there at their house, for two days while I waited for time to give birth...I eventually went to Kona Hospital, as 62 hard hours of labor, progressed and my first child was born to the Earth on September 11th, before that date was significant to tragedy, or loss, in America. It still resonates with me as the day my heart was further opened to unconditional love.